Season: Five — Episode: 11 Director: Robert de Lint — Writer: Andrew Carr — Aired: February 4, 2008 — Viewers (millions): 1.41 Summary: Hank takes Lacey's old gumball machine and starts a business with Oscar which is soon rivalled by Karen. Brent takes over water divination from Emma to impress an admirer. Wanda takes being a real estate agent too seriously, selling a house to Lacey and Davis, who plan to flip it.
That's you on the make? No wonder I don't have any grandchildren.
— Emma to Brent
Outside the Ruby Cafe, Hank gets a broken gumball machine from Lacey. He mistakenly remembers chewing gum with Lacey when he was a kid. At Corner Gas, a farmer, Terry, asks Emma for help finding water. She explains to Brent that she's skilled at water divination, which her father taught her. However, Brent calls her a witch. At the Ruby as Josh cooks, Lacey notices a flyer advertising a house for sale which Wanda is the realtor for. Expressing a desire to buy and flip a house, Davis doubts she can do it. Seeing Hank fixing the gumball machine, Oscar tells Hank he has no experience running a business. At the Corner Gas pumps, Karen learns of Emma's skill from Brent and they poke fun at her. Emma asks Brent to give her a ride to Terry's farm. With the gumball machine operational in the Ruby, Hank gets no buyers. To help, Oscar changes the sign on the machine to "Corner Gum."
She's a witch!
At Bernie's house, the home Wanda is selling, she lies to Lacey that she has another offer. However, Davis overhears and tells Lacey she said the same thing to him. At the Ruby, with no one still buying any gumballs, Oscar believes a gimmick is required. Hank sings a song but once Karen buys a gumball and blows a huge bubble, kids flock to the machine. At Bernie's, Wanda tries to pit Davis against Lacey to jack up their bids. Once they hit on the idea to become partners, Wanda discourages it until they threaten to not buy the house. At the Ruby, while Hank and Oscar propose that Karen become their gumball rep, Jane asks Karen for a picture with her son. Hank announces that everyone who buys a gumball gets a free picture with Karen, which causes a stampede to the machine.
Hey, look at Karen.
At Terry's farm, Brent kids Emma about divination until Terry's cute niece, Jennifer, shows interest in Emma's skill. Emma gives Brent the divining rods and despite being an amateur, the rods cross. Terry believes Brent's found water and Brent tries to impress Jennifer. At the Ruby with Emma, Brent tells Hank about his experience. Emma tries to portray Brent as a "man-witch" but Hank thinks Brent's skill is cool. Wanda gives Davis and Lacey the keys to their new house. Davis' elation quickly turns to remorse, once he realizes what he's taken on. Lacey cheers him up, intent on flipping the house quickly. At Corner Gum, Karen performs for the kids but Hank and Oscar don't like that she's adding to the act and say she's just the pretty face behind the bubble.
You need any water found today?
While painting their new house, Lacey details the amount of work she put into choosing the colours. Davis makes a comment as if he and Lacey are a couple and she has to pull him back to reality. As Hank and Oscar walk in front of the Ruby with a fresh batch of gumballs, Wanda does a real estate sales pitch from her "office" on the Ruby's deck. Entering the cafe, they find that Karen's set up her own, much fancier, gumball machine. At Corner Gas, as Brent plays up his divination experience for Wanda, Emma reminds him they haven't drilled to confirm he found water. Emma teases Brent about liking Jennifer and Wanda asks if Jennifer is looking to buy a home. Planning to head out to the farm for the drilling, Brent tells Emma he wants to shave and shower first.
Continuing to paint, Davis looks out the window and imagines his children playing there. Lacey dissuades him from any notions that the kids will be theirs and reminds him they're selling the house asap. Karen meets some kids in front of the Ruby who refuse to buy her gum, saying it was tested on animals. Inside, she finds that Corner Gum is advertising that its gum is cruelty-free. Jane tells Karen she should be ashamed despite her protests that she's been slandered. At Terry's farm, Brent is concerned that Jennifer's not there to witness the drilling. The auger hits something and Brent brags that he should have the first drink of water. However, the drill hit an old septic tank and Jennifer arrives just in time to smell the sewage.
We are not having kids, OK?
Emma promises to keep secret that Brent found crap but later in the Ruby, Brent sees the headline in the Howler providing details. With Davis and Lacey having finished fixing the house up, Wanda takes a couple for a viewing. Indicating they don't intend to have children, Davis lies that a murder happened in the basement to scare them off. Incurring both Wanda and Lacey's ire, Davis explains that he thinks the couple will flip the house. At the Ruby, Karen turns the tables on Hank and Oscar by lying that their gum is made by children. Wanda brings through another couple that meets Davis' approval as they plan to have children. However the wife, Jenny, wants to re-paint the interior. Lacey shoos them out resulting in Wanda threatening to quit being their realtor.
At the Corner Gas pumps, Hank pokes fun at Brent finding sewage. Karen accuses Hank of maligning her gumballs again, as no one is buying them. Hank reports the same problem and they wonder what's going on. In front of the Foo Mart, they discover that Oscar's set up multiple machines with toys, stickers and gum, driving them both out of business. A couple who are planning a family and love the colour scheme are shown through the house by Wanda. Davis and Lacey both approve and the couple decides to buy the house. However, outside, Davis smells sewage resulting in them bringing Brent over to locate it. Pointing out they should have had the house inspected before buying it, Wanda says she has no realtor credentials.
Ha, ha, that's right! I'm back!
Having still sold the house to the couple, Davis and Lacey visit to bring them a house warming gift. They're surprised to find a woman they don't know living in the house. She relates that the couple Davis and Lacey sold the house to quickly flipped it and made a profit. The woman also says that she repainted the walls. Brent visits Terry's farm under the guise of apologizing to Jennifer for finding sewage. She admits that she found him cute when he was divining, which gets Brent's hopes up. Jennifer then mentions that her boyfriend found it hilarious that Brent found a septic tank. The boyfriend arrives wanting a picture with the "crap man" and leaves to get his camera. After Jennifer says that Brent resembles her aunt, who fixed toilets, Brent gives up and leaves.
I'm sure it happens to everyone.
The address of the house Wanda sells is 507 Scott Avenue, a real house and street in Rouleau, Saskatchewan.
Jackass!: Oscar calls Hank a jackass when he tries to chew on a rubber ball, having mistaken it for a gumball.
"No, you're a pretty face behind the big bubble."
―Hank to Karen
"Geez, you gotta let that go, you're not even a real estate agent. Not a real, real estate agent. You're like a fake estate agent."