Season: Two — Episode: 1 Director: David Storey — Writer: Brent Butt & Mark Farrell — Aired: October 5, 2004 — Viewers (millions): N/A Summary: Lacey tries to work out where she and Brent stand after the Grey Cup incident. Karen launches a full investigation after reports of gunfire around town, only to discover it may be an inside job. Hank suckers Oscar into buying his old outboard motor, using money he stole from Emma.
At Corner Gas, Hank bemoans to Brent that no one describes height in metric. To allay Brent's confusion, he asks Wanda how tall she is and ends up insulting her. At the Ruby Cafe, Lacey tells Wanda that she has something to discuss about Brent. At the Police station, Karen tells Davis they've received a call that shots were fired. Karen is aghast when Davis tells her he fired the shots at crows in Lumsden's farm as their scarecrow wasn't working. At the Ruby, Lacey asks Wanda if Brent ever talks about her which makes Wanda wonder if Lacey is attracted to him.
A scarecrow should look scary.
At Corner Gas, Hank tells Brent he found a buyer for a boat motor but won't say who. Oscar bursts in, demanding Brent not tell Emma where he is as she's angry at him. However, Brent points out Emma's already there. At the Ruby, after Wanda believes that Lacey and Brent slept together, with Josh listening in, Lacey explains that she and Brent almost kissed. However, she just wants to be friends and is worried she'll hurt his feelings if she tells him. Wanda unsuccessfully tries to blackmail Lacey in exchange for her silence on the matter. Emma reveals she's angry with Oscar as he took $90 from her night stand. Brent figures out that Oscar is the buyer of Hank's motor.
Did you and Brent make out?
To Davis' concern, Karen tells him that she has to file a report on him firing his weapon. As Brent, Hank and Wanda watch Emma and Oscar argue, Lacey asks Brent to come to the Ruby. As she starts to talk about their near kiss, Brent gently says that he doesn't think they should date. Confused and a little hurt, Lacey starts to ask why but Brent is called away by a customer's car arriving. Karen starts to ominously question Davis for the report. The fight between Emma and Oscar spills outside Corner Gas as Oscar evades Emma by running around a Jenny's car. Oscar ends up running away at a surprising speed, leaving Emma holding his jacket.
Mom, Dad, settle down, okay?
At the Ruby, Lacey tells Wanda that Brent isn't interested in her but when she wonders why, Wanda relates that Brent is out of her league. She leaves a puzzled Lacey with advice to lower her standards and then look for someone to date. Karen grills Davis on what he was doing after he fired his weapon, offers him coffee and then claims they have none. Still puzzled over Wanda's assessment of Brent's attractiveness, Lacey discusses it with Hank who shares Wanda's assessment. Lacey's puzzlement peeves Hank who takes it as a slight. Karen continues questioning Davis and when he notices she's drinking a coffee, she plays mind games with him by denying she claimed they were out.
The average guy is...and Brent is...
On Main Street, Lacey asks Emma if Brent is attracted to her. Although Emma hopes so, she tells Lacey that Brent is so good-looking that it's an impediment to him meeting someone. Not believing that Lacey isn't attracted to Brent, Emma offers her sympathies, leaving a baffled Lacey standing on the street. Having escaped Emma, Oscar meets Hank at Lumsden's farm to buy the boat motor. Initially not impressed that the motor is only 15 horsepower, when Hank expresses the larger metric equivalent, Oscar gives Hank the $90 he stole from Emma. Karen has Davis so rattled that he confesses to several incidents where he used his weapon recklessly. Karen finishes the report, leading Davis to believe he'll be fired. However, since Davis is her superior officer, Karen files the report with him. Realizing he's been played, Davis tears up the report while Karen looks on, smiling.
This has been a real eye opener, Davis.
Having learned that Hank has her $90, Emma tracks Hank down at the Dog River Hotel where he's playing pool. Intimidated by Emma, Hank asks her to take the matter up with Oscar. Emma challenges Hank to play pool for the money but after Hank beats her 10 games in a row and Emma won't spot playing, Hank gives it to her. At the hotel, Lacey asks Karen if she thinks she's attractive, leading Karen to believe Lacey thinks she's gay. Lacey then asks if Brent is better looking than her. After lying that Lacey is a more attractive woman than Brent is a man, Karen indicates she said it to make Lacey feel better and that Brent is too attractive for her.
The next day at the Ruby, Lacey tells Karen and Wanda that the woman in town believe Brent is attractive because the other men in town are so flawed. Saying they understand Lacey's theory, Lacey cuts them off and considers the matter settled. With Lacey out of earshot, Karen and Wanda agree that Lacey's fooling herself and Brent is hot. At the Leroy's, Emma doesn't tell Oscar that she got the $90 back from Hank but without malice, warns him that "you're gonna get yours." Later at Lumsden's farm, Oscar checks out his motor and sees that the boat it's attached to has three holes in the side, not knowing they were caused by Davis' gunshots. As revenge, Oscar puts holes in Emma's mixing bowls. Denying she put holes in the boat, Oscar doesn't believe her.
Think about the men of Dog River.
Outside the police station, Davis thanks Karen for scaring him into realizing he must be more careful with his weapon in the future. Hank asks to borrow Davis' gun to shoot squirrels in his attic, which Davis cheerfully provides. Scolded by Karen, Davis tells Hank he'll have to file a report which Hank brushes off. At the Ruby, as Brent enjoys a chili cheese dog, Lacey asks why he likes them so much. In the course of conversation, Brent admits to being lazy, a glutton and then shoves half the remaining dog into his mouth. As Lacey watches him chew with food all over his face, she jokes that he is unattainable.
You are so out of my league.
Although Emma took Oscar's jacket when he wouldn't give her back the $90 he took from her, he somehow has the jacket back on when he meets Hank to buy the boat motor.
"So Brent's really good looking?"
"You're not the first to fall for that chiselled face, and I'm afraid you won't be the last. So don't be too hurt if Brent ends up being a little bit beyond your reach."