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"TV Free Dog River"
◀️ Super Sensitive Logo 01.jpg Queasy Rider ▶️  Transcript Script icon.png

Season: Six — Episode: 13
Director: David Storey — Writer: Norm Hiscock & Dylan Wertz — Aired: March 2, 2009 — Viewers (millions): 1.17
Summary: Emma keeps a watchful eye on the citizens of Dog River to ensure the town beats Wullerton in "Turn Off Your TV Week." Lacey and Oscar find a profitable way to break the rules and Karen and Davis hit the radio airwaves to help everyone cope. Brent finds a creative way to get through a week of no TV with the help of Hank and Wanda.

Cast

Logo 01.jpg Episode Cast
Main Cast
Featured

Plot

“
You ought to be ashamed of yourself. I invite you into my house, charge you five bucks to watch a crappy TV and this is how you repay me?
”
— Oscar to Ian
At Hank's house, Hank watches an amateur stuntman ride a trike down a hill. Later at a park, he tries the same stunt except he rides down a slide. Brent and Wanda watch Hank hurt himself and Brent tells a group of kids, including Molly, to not try this. At a meeting at the Town Hall, Emma proposes that Dog River enter a contest to not watch TV for a week to beat Wullerton. Hank blames TV for his accident and is with Emma but Brent and Oscar aren't. Lacey thinks she'll manage easily but then goes on about a kid's dance show she loves. Wanda doesn't pay attention and Emma tricks everyone into voting "yes." Days later at the Ruby Cafe as Josh cooks, Brent and Lacey both lie that they're doing fine not watching TV. Lacey's resorted to calling people to get update on her favourite show. At the Police station, Karen discovers Davis has set up a radio transmitter and proposes hosting a jazz station. However, Karen would rather do a classic rock show.



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Those in favour of no TV for a week and sticking it to Wullerton, spit.
Outside Corner Gas, Hank lauds his new-found knowledge to Wanda, gained from reading cereal boxes. He insists he knows an answer in Wanda's crossword and wanting to write it himself, they begin to struggle over it. A bored Brent sees Wanda slapping Hank and perks up. At the Leroy's, Oscar's also bored and is told by Emma to clean the basement. His grumbling turns to joy when he finds an old portable TV. In order to cause more conflict, at the Ruby, Brent tells Hank that Wanda wants him to empty her wash bucket. Brent then tells Wanda, who's washing windows, that Hank thinks he's smarter then her now. From inside the station, Brent eats popcorn and watches Hank dump out Wanda's bucket, causing her to throw a sponge at him, and a fight ensues.



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Shh, shh. My show's on.
At the Ruby as Mertyl drinks coffee, Oscar tells Lacey he can arrange for her to watch her show. Secretly taking her to the basement of his house, he teases her with the show and then demands $5. At the Police station, Davis adopts a smooth voice for his jazz show while Karen is wacky and uses sound effects for her weather reports. Davis tries to interview Emma for the show but is interrupted by Karen's sound effects. At the Ruby, Emma nearly catches Oscar trying to get new clients to watch his TV but he explains that he's selling moonshine. At Corner Gas, Brent tells Hank that Wanda's threatened by his intelligence and has challenged him to a game of chess. Lacey joins Oscar and a group of people watching TV in the basement. Having brought sticky buns, she bribes Oscar with one, in exchange for free TV and they start charging a lot for the treats.



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Why are you talking like that?
Outside Corner Gas, Hank and Wanda sit down to play chess while Brent and a crowd furtively watch from inside the station. Wanda's pieces are glued to the board so she starts throwing them at Hank. She then notices the crowd in the station watching them, who scatter. Taking requests on his show, Davis is discouraged that no one's a jazz fan. He does get a call from Michael Bublé, requesting one of his own songs, but Davis insists that Bublé's music isn't jazz. Karen suggests Davis lighten up so he tries a crank call on Brent. Pretending to be several jazz musicians, Brent points out they're deceased. Davis uses one of Karen's sound effects and hangs up. At Corner Gas, a crowd's gathered to watch Hank and Wanda's antics, including Jenny. However, they're disappointed when Hank and Wanda play act a fight while showing merchandise from several of the town's businesses.



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The Hank and Wanda Show...
Oscar has a group of people in the basement watching TV when he hears Emma arrive upstairs. Hiding the TV under a table, they pretend to play cards. Emma suspects they're violating the ban and lifts up a box to find a radio. Oscar turns it on to hear Karen. Hank and Wanda head to the Hotel bar and collect some minor perks from Phil and Darren for advertising their businesses. In the basement, as Ian is watching TV, Lacey catches him with an outside sandwich and he is kicked out by Oscar. A crowd that gathers at Corner Gas to watch Hank and Wanda are disappointed that their performance is an ad for the Foo Mart. At the Police station, Davis and Karen field calls that TV is being watched at the Leroy's and a report of a fire.



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Just a friendly game of cards.
Hank and Wanda arrive at Corner Gas wearing ads for Todd's Junk and a salon. Brent relates that everyone left because they sold out with product placements. Davis and Karen bust into the Leroy's where Karen finds the TV in the basement and Davis catches Emma watching TV in the bathroom. She suggests they lie in order to beat Wullerton in the contest. At the Hotel bar, TV is being watched again and Brent reads in the Howler that Dog River won the contest. Hank sees a commercial in which a man opens a beer bottle with his teeth. Encouraged by Wanda to try it, Hank hurts himself. Brent breaks the fourth wall and speaking to the children in the audience, cautions them not to lie unless telling the truth will result in a hassle or someone getting mad at them.



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We were just trying to make a buck.

Trivia

  • The Harvester Club of Dog River Branch 252 plaque is visible on the wall at the town meeting. ("Potato Bowl")
  • Lacey commenting that the channel that plays the Hockey Night in Canada theme can't be the CBC refers to CBC losing the rights to the music in 2008.
  • During Davis' crank call to Brent, he keeps impersonating dead jazz musicians except for Ornette Coleman, who was alive in 2009.
  • One of the pictures behind Davis and Karen when they're broadcasting is Davis as Constable McWoof. ("Dog River Vice")
  • The Flintstones episode Ian refers to is No Biz Like Show Biz.
  • Hank wears a placard for Todd's Junk store. ("Poor Brent")
  • Jackass!: At the Town Hall, Oscar calls Hank a jackass for agreeing with Emma's proposal to enter into a contest with Wullerton to not watch TV for a week.

Quotes

"Yeah, 'cause that's what Saskatchewan needs, another classic rock station. Maybe we could call it "The Bear" or "The Goat" or "The Moose.""
―Davis

Gallery

Corner Gas Season Six Episodes
Full LoadBend It Like BrentSelf-ServingMeat WaveAll That and a Bag of ChipsGood Tubbin'American ResolutionReader PrideRock StarsShirt DisturberCat River DazeSuper SensitiveTV Free Dog RiverQueasy RiderR2 Bee TooCrab Apple CoolerHappy Career Day to YouGet the F Off My LawnYou've Been Great, Goodnight

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