Season: Four — Episode: 17 Director: David Storey — Writer: Mark Farrell & Rob Sheridan — Aired: February 26, 2007 — Viewers (millions): 1.74 Summary: Brent decides to try different alternatives to glasses after he breaks them, something Wanda doesn't believe he's man enough to do. Hank's conversations with Emma produce a wealth of slogans which he pitches to Lacey, Davis and Karen.
At Corner Gas, Brent squints as he tries to fix the arm on his glasses. Hank pokes fun at the irony and hits Brent's hand, causing him to break the arm off. At the Ruby Cafe, Hank finds Davis and Karen trying to come up with a slogan for the police cruiser. He suggests a famous soup slogan which Karen decries. At Corner Gas, Wanda deduces that Hank broke Brent's glasses and laughs when he attaches the arm with tape. Brent thinks the tape isn't noticeable but at the Ruby as Josh cooks, Lacey laughs when she sees his glasses. While Lacey puts clear tape on the glasses, Karen asks if Brent has considered laser eye surgery. Brent imagines a James Bond-like scenario while Karen and Lacey both say Brent is too afraid to get the procedure.
Did you get kicked by a donkey?
I expect you to die. Eventually.
At Corner Gas, Oscar rants about Wanda over-charging by 25¢. Emma comments "No Crime too Small" which Hank overhears. Later, in front of the Police station, Hank tells Davis the slogan but doesn't get a chance to give Emma credit for it. At Corner Gas, Wanda sees Brent looking through the Yellow Pages for laser eye surgery. Carefully considering it, he then makes a snap decision to get it after Lacey taunts him. In the cruiser, across from the Post Office, Karen grouses about the new slogan. Oscar sees a car make a rolling stop at a stop sign and complains that if they don't arrest the offender, they're falsely advertising. Davis and Karen reluctantly chase after the car. At the Leroy's, Hank explains to Emma that he didn't give her credit for the new police slogan but Emma doesn't care.
Way to brand us.
With Wanda, at a laser eye surgeon's office in Regina, Brent leaves after seeing a model of an eyeball that opens up. They then visit a popsicle stand where Wanda is happy to accommodate Brent's request that she not tell Lacey he chickened out. After a teen coughs on Oscar, he goes to the Police station and demands action from Davis and Karen. At the Ruby, without his glasses, Brent lies to Lacey that he had the surgery. She's doubtful and comments on how quickly he recovered. Brent knocks over a cup of coffee, which Wanda takes the blame for, looking forward to years of Brent having accidents. Hank arrives and proudly displays the Howler in which he's thanked for the police slogan. With Wanda's help, Brent pretends he can read the paper. Brent then asks Hank for a slogan for Corner Gas.
Let's blow this popsicle stand.
At the Foo Mart, Oscar arrests Mayor Fitzy for taking two bananas out of bunch. Later at the Police station, Fitzy protests that a bunch is too much for him. Oscar recommends making muffins with the extra bananas but when Fitzy wants to add raisins to them, Oscar orders that Fitzy be booked. Davis tells Karen he has a plan to stop Oscar bothering them constantly. At Corner Gas, Hank's attempts to come up with a slogan for the station on his own fail. In order to keep fooling Lacey, Brent orders contact lenses and tents his fingers, scheming. At the Leroy's as Emma is gardening, Hank talks with her about Corner Gas and Emma inadvertently provides another slogan, "It's not just about the gas." Later, Emma visits the station with Oscar, who likes the slogan and maligns Emma for not coming up with it.
Brent's contacts arrive and he realizes he's going to have to touch his eyes. Wanda calls him a baby for being concerned, which he refutes but in private, he can't put the contacts in. Davis and Karen take Oscar to some bushes across the street from a house. Giving him binoculars, they indicate there's been suspicious activity and he's to watch the house for them. At the Ruby, Hank shows Lacey another copy of the Howler in which he's been thanked for the new Corner Gas slogan. He cockily tells Lacey he can come up with one for the Ruby, but says the slogan that's already on the bottom of the cafe's bills. At the Leroy's, Emma not interested in helping Hank, feeling that he's weaseled enough out of her that she's received no credit for. However, while arguing with him about the Ruby, she says "What's not to like?" which becomes its new slogan.
They used the same pun twice.
Later, while Emma is at the Ruby, she sees the new slogan and is miffed with Hank. Brent confesses to Lacey that he didn't get the eye surgery and asks for her help tricking Wanda into believing that he's wearing the contacts. At the Corner Gas pumps, Emma tells Karen that Hank is stealing the slogans from her. Karen relates that she doesn't like the new police slogan but loves Emma's new idea, "To Serve and Connect." However, Karen doesn't get Emma's permission to use it. At the Ruby, Wanda comments that she can't see Brent's contacts. Lacey puts into action a ploy whereby she claims to have lost an earring which Brent sees across the cafe, impressing Wanda. Karen asks Brent to move his car which he backs into the Ruby's garbage cans while Lacey and Wanda watch.
Nice one, eagle eyes.
Lacey and Wanda confess their secrets that Brent hasn't corrected his vision and they plan to get him back. While looking at the house, Oscar is caught by the occupant, Helen who calls the police. Davis and Karen threaten to arrest Oscar, citing their slogan. Oscar points out its stupidity and he's forced to agree to stop asking them to apply it. Helen still wants Oscar arrested but Karen belittles her concern. At the Ruby, Hank is proud to see the slogan he suggested on the bottom of the receipts. However, Jenny and Jane take the slogan as a challenge and write things they didn't like on their bills. Lacey's peeved at Hank and rebukes him when he blames the slogan on Emma.
Ah, get over yourself.
At Corner Gas, Lacey and Wanda put their revenge into action. First, getting him to agree that Lacey is wearing a nice headband when she's not wearing one, they then give him one of the Ruby's new receipts and ask him to read the slogan. Hank arrives, demanding Lacey continue using his slogan which he repeats to Brent. Referring to the bill, Brent agrees with Hank so Lacey points out that's not what's on the receipt. Instead, the slogan calls Brent a liar and scared to touch his eyes. Brent critisizes the ladies for their trickery so Lacey does "schemey fingers" but is told by Wanda to only do them while plotting, not afterwards. At the Ruby, Davis isn't happy with the new slogan on the cruiser, which Karen got from Emma. Seeing that it's also the Ruby's latest slogan, Emma tells Karen that she never asked her if they could use it.
Hey, that's ours.
The doctor's name in the eye clinic Brent and Wanda visit is episode director David Storey.
"I hope this goes on for years. You're going to be staggering into lamp posts, putting Preparation H on your toothbrush."