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"Coming Distractions"
◀️ No Time Like the Presents Logo 01.jpg The Accidental Cleanist ▶️  Transcript Script icon.png

Season: Five — Episode: 16
Director: David Storey — Writer: Norm Hiscock & Gary Pearson — Aired: March 31, 2008 — Viewers (millions): N/A
Summary: Hank gets Brent and Davis to separately take him to see the latest blockbuster, Raptorman 2. Emma invites Lacey to join a women's club, even though Lacey has a feeling she might not fit in. Oscar gets a sidewalk put in front of his house and Karen is forced to protect it.

Cast

Logo 01.jpg Episode Cast
Main Cast
Featured

Plot

“
Next time you see me, my finger will be caked in cement and your reputations will lie in ruin.
”
— Wanda
At the Ruby Cafe, after Lacey tells Brent he forgot to pay for his lunch, he refutes her claim that he'd be easy to find. He daydreams that he's a fugitive and is arrested by Beth and Duane "Dog" Chapman. Later at the Ruby, Davis can't convince Karen to see a sci-fi movie, "Raptorman 2." However, Brent wants to go and Karen calls them nerds. At Mayor Fitzy's office, Oscar complains he wants a sidewalk in front of his house. Fitzy dissuades him until Oscar relates that a car nearly hit him and he got the plate number. Fitzy being the driver, he tells Oscar he'll get his sidewalk right away. At Corner Gas, Hank talks Brent into seeing Raptorman 2 despite Brent having promised Davis he'd see it with him first. At the theatre, Hank threatens to tell Davis that Brent saw the movie with him unless he pays for drinks.



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His reign of terror is over.
At the Ruby, Lacey and Wanda watch Emma, Mertyl and a group of old women, the "Purple Hats", having fun. Emma asks Lacey, but not Wanda to join their club. Lacey is reluctant, given how much younger she is than the group members. The movie over, Hank is thrilled and wants to see it again but Brent thinks it stunk. At the Ruby as Josh cooks, Emma gives Lacey a pink hat and implies that Lacey is close to fifty years old. Lacey protests and isn't going to join the club until she sees Karen arrive and act like she's with them. Lacey joins but discovers that Karen's only there to drive Mertyl home. At Corner Gas, Oscar shows Brent the plans for his sidewalk but swears Brent to secrecy when Wanda arrives. However, once Oscar leaves Brent tells Wanda, who remembers times she wrote her name in other freshly-poured sidewalks.



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But, they waved at you.
At the Ruby, Hank effuses about the movie to Davis while he and Brent pretend that Hank went alone. At the Leroy's as the sidewalk's being poured, Oscar tells Fitzy he's worried about Wanda defacing it. Wanda drives by slowly and stares at them with malice. At the Police station, Oscar demands that Davis guard the sidewalk but thinking it's demeaning, he orders Karen to do it. At the Foo Mart, Hank convinces Davis to see the movie and blackmails him into paying for the tickets. Like Brent, Davis hates the movie while Hank still loves it. While guarding the sidewalk, Karen is belittled by two teens. Wanda arrives and learning that Karen doesn't know that she's the vandal, offers to watch the sidewalk while Karen gets a coffee. Karen returns to find Wanda's written a message in the concrete and see her drive by in triumph.



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Oh man, I gotta see this movie.
At the Ruby, Brent and Davis both make excuses why they can't see the movie. Hank arrives and tacitly blackmails both of them into paying for them to see the movie together. At the Corner Gas pumps, Wanda makes fun of an out-dated blouse Lacey's wearing and gives her a senior's discount on her gas purchase. At the theatre, Brent and Davis are bored but Hank revels in the movie. That evening at the Hotel bar, Lacey line-dances with the Purple Hats under Dwight's instruction but isn't very adept. Noticing the ladies there, Brent and Oscar initially want to leave but seeing Lacey's bad dancing, they decide to stay and make fun of her. The next day at the Leroy's, having fixed the sidewalk, a worker tells Oscar and Karen it's a one-time deal. Oscar questions him on this until the worker threatens him.



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She's got the rhythm of a third-legged panda.
At the Ruby, Davis tells Brent he didn't like the movie and confesses he saw it with Hank. Brent tries to confess but stops when Davis offers to buy him breakfast for breaking their pact. At the Leroy's, Wanda turns on the sprinkler to draw Karen away from the sidewalk but Wanda's caught by Oscar. Vowing that she will find a way to write her name in the cement, she laughs maniacally. In front of the Foo Mart, Wanda clandestinely tries to get Emma to speak into a tape recorder. Emma sees through Wanda's ploy but voluntarily records what Wanda tells her to say. At the Ruby, Lacey confesses to Hank that she's behaving like an old woman would. Hank tries to comfort her but Lacey insists on wetting her finger and rubbing something off Hank's cheek.



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Freeze!
Calling the Leroy's, Wanda uses the tape she made with Emma to occupy Oscar by having him record a TV show. She then tackles Karen and writes "Wanda" on the sidewalk. At Corner Gas, having seen the movie a fourth time, Hank tells Brent and Davis that his fondness for it is waning. Davis informs him that everything's in the open now which results in Hank revealing that he went to the movie with Brent first. Davis guilts Brent into buying him a breakfast but Hank can't guilt Brent into paying for another movie for them. At the Ruby with the Purple Hats, Lacey's wearing a yellow hat, bluntly tells them they're old and leaves the club. Emma and the ladies are glad she did and laugh.



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Victory is mine!
Wanda brings Brent and Davis to see the sidewalk but finds it now says "Wanda loves Davis." Sitting on the police cruiser, Karen waves at Wanda, having gotten her back as the cement is dry. Davis believes that Wanda has feelings for him causing her to quickly leave. At Fitzy's office, Wanda demands the sidewalk be taken out which Fitzy refuses to do. Wanda then uses a jackhammer to take out the offending slab which bewilders Karen and angers the worker who fixed the sidewalk after her first defacement. Brent, Hank and Lacey go to see a different movie and Lacey expresses her relief at not having to wear a stupid hat anymore. However, the popcorn combos come with a goofy construction helmet which Hank gives to her and Brent to wear.



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Oh, it's gonna be fun!

Trivia

  • As Brent and Hank leave the theatre, the movie playing across from Raptorman 2 is "Contagious Fortune".
  • Karen mentions she's picking up Mertyl because she has a bad hip. Mertyl had her hip replaced in 2005 but it didn't stop her from curling and winning the Clavet Cup. ("Hurry Hard") It also didn't stop her from country line dancing later in the episode.
  • There's always been a sidewalk in front of the Leroy's house, right back to when it was shown in the first episode. ("Ruby Reborn") To boot, the old sidewalk is seen at 17:10, just before Oscar answers the phone and Wanda plays a tape recording of Emma.
  • Writer and story editor Andrew Carr appears as "Cement Guy."
  • Jackass!: Oscar says it twice. After Fitzy nearly hits Oscar with his car, Oscar calls him a jackass. When Brent glibly says Oscar's sidewalk is going to be rectangular, he calls him a jackass.

Quotes

"You know it's a good movie when it's on a cereal box."
―Hank

Gallery

Corner Gas Season Five Episodes
Cable ExcessSpin CycleWhiner Takes AllDark CirclesWash MeThe Eight SamuraiBuzz DriverClassical GasGame, Set and MouseKnit Wit of the MonthTop GumThe J-WordOutside the BoxContagious FortuneNo Time Like the PresentsComing DistractionsThe Accidental CleanistBed and Brake FastFinal Countdown

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