Season: Six — Episode: 7 Director: David Storey — Writer: Mark Farrell — Aired: January 12, 2009 — Viewers (millions): 1.01 Summary: Karen, Hank, and Wanda's willpower is tested when they try to make one another break their New Year's resolutions. Davis tries to get out of making coffee at the Police station. Brent and Emma teach Oscar a thing or two about being a Canadian citizen.
You don't have to actually be sorry, just say you're sorry. It's the Canadian way.
On New Years Eve at the Hotel bar, Hank resolves to not read comics, Wanda to give up licorice and Karen to run every day. Lacey indicates she'll give up chewing gum while Brent won't eat chili cheese dogs. However, as soon as midnight strikes, Brent bites into one. Six months later at Corner Gas, Hank gets annoyed as Brent talks about a comic book, as he's kept his resolution. Wanda's kept hers too and stares at a jar of licorice that she imagines talks to her, tempting her to eat the candy. Later, at the Ruby Cafe, Karen limps in, still running everyday. However when Hank arrives, she shows no sign of injury and talks about a comic book to tempt Hank before leaving. Lacey proposes Hank and Wanda team up to beat Karen and he laughs when she lauds being a good schemer. At the Police station, Davis leaves a bit of coffee in the pot so Karen will have to make a new one.
Our resolutions have to be hard.
At the Corner Gas pumps, Emma tells Brent that due to a technicality, Oscar's Canadian citizenship was revoked while in the USA decades ago. They tease Oscar that this explains his grouchy behaviour and that he's an American. In the station, Hank proposes teaming up to Wanda and catches her talking to the licorice. Brent and Emma arrive at the Police station and Davis gives Emma just enough coffee so a new pot will need to be made. Indicating they need help with Oscar, Davis produces a file to commit him to a mental hospital. When told they just want help pranking Oscar, Davis says the file was a joke. Karen arrives and Davis gets her to make more coffee. At the Ruby, Hank suggests stealing Karen's shoes which Wanda doesn't think will stop her from running until an eavesdropping Lacey mentions Karen wears special shoes.
It's Jackaus, actually.
Lacey's request to help with their scheme evokes laughter from Hank and Wanda. Davis pulls Oscar over for speeding and as part of the prank, seriously questions Oscar's citizenship when he displays lack of understanding of the metric system. At the Leroy's, a panicky Oscar tells Brent and Emma that the cops are onto him not being Canadian. They give him advice to appear to be more Canadian including curbing him saying "jackass." While Wanda calls Karen to Corner Gas, Hank arrives at the Police station with a crowbar and catches Davis nearly emptying the coffee pot. Davis lets Hank break into Karen's locker to steal her shoes in exchange for not revealing his coffee ploy. At the Ruby, Lacey brings Oscar an order that's slightly wrong and he begins to rant until Brent cautions him.
And that jackass thing...
Oscar stops and uncharacteristically apologizes to Lacey. She learns of the scheme from Brent that Oscar's been tricked that he's American but Brent won't let her help. At Corner Gas, Hank is wearing Karen's shoes, having sold his own. Wanda's frustration with Hank's incompetence boils over and she begins yelling at the licorice, which she still imagines is talking to her. At the Police station, Karen discovers her busted locker and stolen shoes which Davis tries to distract her from by suggesting they have coffee. Seeing there's only a little left in the pot, Karen says she's the only one making it. Davis switches the conversation back to the missing shoes. At the Ruby, Lacey tells Wanda about a lame scheme she pulled and also that she saw Karen limping so Wanda doesn't have to partner with Hank anymore to win the resolution competition.
You are a mental case.
Wanda returns Karen's shoes to her at the Police station and reveals that Davis doesn't make coffee. At Corner Gas, Brent tells Oscar he's still acting too American which Emma demonstrates when Oscar's excited about having apple pie and watching a baseball game. Oscar leaves and Emma cautions Brent about not taking the scheme too far. Later at the Ruby, as Oscar reads the Howler, he and Brent have a rehearsed conversation in which Oscar corrects Brent for using American lingo. The patrons in the cafe look on with disinterest. At Corner Gas, Wanda's now teamed up with Karen, asks Hank to watch the station and leaves a Canadian comic book on the counter, hoping to tempt him. Oscar arrives and reads the book to show he's Canadian. Watching from outside, Karen and Wanda call the station and asking for Oscar, tell him to put the book down, causing him to frantically think he's being watched.
I'm not an American.
At the Leroy's, Brent continues the scheme and tells Oscar that if he sings the Canadian anthem at a lacrosse game, he'll have his citizenship restored. Oscar's nervous about doing this which Brent makes worse by trying to mix Oscar up by saying the lyrics to the US anthem. Having accidentally emptied the coffee pot, Davis asks Lacey to teach him how to make coffee. At Corner Gas, Hank, Karen and Wanda all try and tempt each other by reading comic books, eating licorice and running on the spot. At the Leroy's as Oscar practices singing "O Canada", Brent keeps trying to confuse him with the US anthem lyrics. Emma thinks Brent is going too far with the prank but he disagrees. At the Ruby, Lacey imagines teaching Davis to make coffee by flying to Colombia but instead, gives him simple instructions.
I guess we should start from square one.
At the lacrosse game, Oscar's extremely nervous which delights Brent, who leaves to get his video camera. He arrives at Corner Gas where Hank, Karen and Wanda are still trying to tempt each other. Thinking Brent's taken the prank too far, Emma tells Oscar about it, making him angry. At the Ruby, Hank, Karen and Wanda agree to give up their resolutions at the same time. However, Lacey reminds them of her's to not chew gum and revels in winning and manipulating them all. Brent returns to the lacrosse game to hear Oscar's left. Having promised to provide an anthem singer, Brent is forced to sing it himself. He confuses the lyrics and melody to the US and Canadian anthems repeatedly while Oscar films it. At the Police station, Karen compliments Davis on the coffee he's made. At the game, to the audience's relief, Brent finally completes singing the Canadian anthem but then proposes singing it in French.
Does ours have rockets in it?
Jackass!: Oscar says it three times, once to a Customs official whose name is Bill Jackaus and twice to Brent for tricking him to appear to be more Canadian. Emma tells Oscar to stop saying jackass which Brent advises changing to "jack-bum."
"I can't hear you, you can't really talk. You're just a piece of candy."
―Wanda to licorice
"I thought this day would come. All you have to do is sign these papers and he'll be committed."
―Davis about Oscar
"And that jackass thing, it does come across as a bit American."